#3 Dominate the Room

When I walk in a room, men see me as a threat.  Rightfully so... their women see me too.  Of my woman, I expect an inverse effect... the heat - of immediate femenine hatred and male lust - thrust upon her.

I see it all the time, a seeming brightness to the room as if suddenly a light has been cast upon my conciousness.  

She's here.

It is an undeniable shift in existence.  My mind is captivated, my knowledge of social propriety and tact abolished by her heels, her hair, her smile.  I stare.

When I catch myself I stop, hopefully soon enough...  nothing but emergency or death will stand between this moment and our first conversation.  What guy that walked in with you?  Didn't see him.

As I plan my move, read you from afar, I further confirm that which I suspected.  You are poised, engaging and funny.  You intimidate boys and captivate men.  Women admire your style, your figure and your intellect and, thereby, loathe you.  

You take the dance floor with confidence.  Your rhythm begs for my lead, your movements regulate my breathing.

Although I am enjoying my evening, talking to a beautiful woman in hopes that you will notice her  laughter, I am involuntarily aware of you.  You are at the bar.  The time is now.  As automatic as blinking, so is my knowledge of your movements about the room...  I didn't realize I was doing it until I thought about it.  Planning in my mind the perfect approach, knowing it will be anything but, I finally decide to act.

As I walk over to you I wonder, "Is she my eight out of ten?"

A Betch's Take: The Hottest Betch in the Bar: Do’s and Don’ts

 

So, this is actually a topic I have been wanting to speak my mind about for a while now… Because Boys, you need to hear it.

 

Things guys do…when they shouldn’t while trying to pick girls up at the bar

 

1)      DO NOT Walk up and touch a girl anywhere and feed them a stupid pick up line

2)      DO NOT purposely run/fall into a group of girls and the Betch your interested in on “accident” (we know it was on purpose..)

3)      The Ass grab. **HATE this one*It is not ok, under any circumstances to walk up to me and grab my ass. At that point, you are dead to me... and nothing you say or do, will make it ok.                     

4)      Don’t send your wingman over to me because he is “to shy” to talk to me. That shows lack of confidence, which is not attractive.(PS-I may just end up liking your wingman instead)

 On the flip side, I may think your friend is just being an ass, trying to play around. Not cool.

5)      Excuse me, Personal space... If you come up to me and we are talking, stay a safe distance. Do not start to feel me up. I do not know you, and at that point, I do not want to.

6)      If you’re lucky enough to get my number, do not text me immediately and be a stage 5 clinger. Creepy. I will run the other way.

7)      If I’m with my girls dancing, do not just walk up and start grinding on me. A) I don’t need to feel your “member” on my ass B) If you approach me and start to do that, I have no idea who is touching me... which gives me the equal right to punch you in your member…

8)      When you are past the point of drunk, you’re most likely very sloppy. That is NOT a good time to try and pick up a betch. Especially if I’m not that drunk. You come across very annoying, immature, and only in it to “win it”.

9)      If you are going to approach me, and talk my ear off about your new puppy for an hour, at least offer me a drink.

10)  Usually when girls are out with other girls, they are there to have a good time. That is NOT a time to approach me and try to have a serious conversation about your future or relationship topics.(True story-has happened)

11)  DO NOT be an asswhole, cocky, immature, or over aggressive.

12)  If you see that I am with another guy (as in more than a friend) DO NOT approach me, that is just awkward, and I am obviously interested in someone else.

 

 

Now, it wouldn’t be fair for me to just give you a list of things NOT to do to….Without giving you a list of recommendations!

I am a Betch, and I know it lol. I am also a promoter (sometimes in Bars/clubs), and I am in the fashion Industry… I’ve seen and heard it all when it comes to a guy trying to get a girl. So, the advice I am going to share, is important!

 

1)      I know I said previously, NO touching AT all, but a slight tap on the shoulder, to get my attention, is ok. Once you have my attention, stop. Because then it gets creepy.

2)      If you are interested in me, don’t be shy, come say hi! But be a gentleman about it. If I am with my friends, introduce yourself to all of them, along with any of your friends. Who knows, maybe our friends would click.

3)      If all goes well, and everyone is getting along, it is ok to ask for ALL of us to go sit at a table, play pool, etc.

4)      Or at this point, you can ask if I want to dance. If I say no, respect it. It does not mean im not interested in you. (Asking now, rather than running up and grinding on me, is 100% more respectful)

5)      You will no if im not interested, if I answer your questions quickly, seem annoyed, talking to my friends more than you, or smile... but with a fake smile (its obvious-trust me)

6)      Girls like a challenge, not a chase. Not a contest of which girl can keep your attention... Meaning, Give me some space, let me spend time with my friends. But if you’re really interested in me, don’t go to the girl 5 ft. away, and start making out with her. Go to the bar with a friend and talk to him for a little. This gives me time to gossip, and decide if I want to pursue anything or not.

7)      While you’re gone, and I decide that I would like to get to know you more, I consider it a challenge. Again, don’t make me chase, because then I will feel unwanted. Betches at this point WILL make eye contact with you across the bar… if interested. If that happens… wait a few minutes, then come back to me and talk some more.

8)      The more I know about you (the general stuff) the more comfortable I am about giving you my number at the end of the night. I need time to feel things out and decide if we would get along ok. Girls can figure that out pretty quick.

9)      When you and I are talking, it doesn’t need to be all about me. I want to know about you too…. Because if I don’t have a general idea of your personality. Or who you are as a person…. My digits will not be given.

10)  Overall, just be Confident. That is sexy in itself. Dress nicely, smell good, and don’t be sloppy. Remember there is a difference between Confidence and Cockiness.

 

I’d say about 70% of the females in a bar, are single and on the prowl. They want to find a man just as bad as you want a Betch. But, most of the time, they are waiting to be approached; girls want to know that you want them. It is all about how you handle yourself and treat a lady.

      If you are cocky and disrespectful, expect a drink in the face, punch in the face, or even kicked out of the bar. If you are polite, respectful and confident…. Then you have a chance….

 

Thank you for listening to me BETCH <3 any questions from a females perspective… tweet me! @amodelsmemo4u =)

-Heather Lynn  

The Hottest Betch at the Bar: A Man's Do's and Don'ts

Men,

You've made your lap, waited for any primping princesses to come out of the bathroom and are reasonably sure you have found the hottest betch in the bar.  Now what?  If you want to wake up with her number in your jeans (or her hair all over your pillow) there are some simple things you need to consider:

Timing
Approach
Salutation
Exit
Revisit

Or for short, T.A.S.E.R. because, when you're done, you want her to feel like she just got fucked up by 100,000 volts of Wow.

If you mess up any of these you've already failed.  We aren't trying to pick up the sloppy mess at the end of the bar on her 15th shot of Cookie Dough vodka, we are going for the prize, the Eightoutof10.  You MUST bring your A game and be prepared for her to throw off your plan at any point.  Be calm, cool, flexible and adaptive as a Man always should be.  In order for you to maximize your potential success, I am going to give you some generalized guidelines for each step.  Pay attention.

Timing:
Betches travel and party in packs.  She doesn't want you to interrupt her deep conversation with her girlfriends about why she hasn't gotten a raise yet or how fat that girl's ass is.  Your best bet is to achieve eye contact from across the bar, disappear from her view and wait until the next round is being ordered.  This will be when the betches either get up from their table to approach the bar or when a friend leaves the group to grab the next round.  The key is to move in during a natural break in conversation so as not to disrupt their flow and thereby put the betches in defense mode.

Approach:
You only have one shot here and it WILL make or break the entire process.  Whatever you do, DO NOT SCARE THEM.  Betches are accustomed to creepers and douches and tend to be a bit jumpy in social settings.  Always approach the pack from a well lit, clearly visible area so as not to startle them.  Take advantage of opportunities that present themselves such as a dropped napkin or a spilled drink.  Showing that you are harmless and sweet is always a smooth route to success.  If such an opportunity does not present itself remember your timing rules and walk up slowly, getting eye contact well before you arrive.  If you hear them whispering "He's coming over," you have either creeped them out or won them over already.  Too late now, you're committed.

Salutation:
"Do you have a mirror in your pocket?  'Cause I can see myself in those jeans." 
No, moron, just NO.  Pickup lines are for movies and 80's sitcoms.  My friend Natalie (@Tali_Ho12) would like me to point out that hot girls know they are hot, you do not need to tell them, bud. The only, and I mean ONLY, thing you should say when you first walk up to a possible Eightoutof10 is any variation of, "Hi, how are you?"  If you just picked up her dropped napkin, gave her a handful of towels for her spilled drink or simply walked up, that is your go to, every time, no matter what, initial line.  Her reaction to your question will tell you everything you need to know about the course of the rest of the conversation...

If she scoffs, laughs disdainfully or has a "Aww, I feel bad for you" face, gracefully exit with a, "My bad, I thought you guys - like me - were here to have a great time," and walk away.  She refused to give you a chance and perhaps the only chance you do have is to show her you don't care if she talks to you and she is missing out on the entertaining evening she desired by blowing you off.

If, however, you get a positive, welcoming vibe from her then congratulations, you are 'in' and the hard part is over.  Introduce yourself to the group but don't put weight on getting their names quite yet.

Betches don't just talk to anybody, a name is earned.

Proceed into small talk being sure to engage her friends as well as the betch you came over for.  You don't have to be right on her, give her some space, stand a friend away from her but never let her wonder who you are there to talk to.  Be funny and show your intelligence.  Cut smiles her direction randomly but not creepily and always monitor her body language.  Legs towards you and shoulders open?  You're doing fine.  On her cell phone and torso away? Uh-oh.  Ask her about herself and see if you can re-engage her in conversation.  The conversation should be 75% about them and 25% about you.  Keep this up for about 5-10 minutes until you know the basic information about the group: where they're from, what they do for school/work and what do they do for fun.  Notice that name still wasn't in there?  We'll get to that...

Exit:
Once you have successfully engaged the pack, made them laugh and shown them you are a decent, eligible and entertaining guy, WALK AWAY. Yes, just walk away.  You have made your good impression, now let the betches talk about you, judge you, and fight over you.  Look at your watch, say, "Hey I have to go meet a friend outside," or, "at the bar," just make sure they know you will be local and then, finally, ask each of their names if they haven't offered them already.  Extend your hand and give them a firm handshake, they are betches, not girls, they can handle it.   

Your assertiveness and ability to walk away will intrigue them.

   If you have succeeded in impressing your main betch and her friends, you are already in.  After a classy closing line such as, "Now if you will excuse me, ladies... it was a pleasure to meet you," ensure that your final glance and smile falls upon the woman you came for and let their betch-ver-sation go wild about your physique as you walk away.

-- Now Men, you must be thinking, "Wait, we didn't get her number, what gives?" Well, my friends, you have just heard a complete breakdown of the oldest move known to Man:  "The Slow Play".  The key to the slow play is to make a solid impression and let the betch dwell on it.  Let her mind wonder why you didn't stay to annoy her and her friends while they drank and made fun of ugly girls.  And then, finally, towards the end of the night, or just before they get up to leave you...

Revisit:
Confidently walk back to your new friends, regardless of current male company, and inform them that you are leaving soon.  Tell your betch that you really enjoyed meeting her and hope to continue your conversation over dinner sometime and ask, respectfully, for her contact information.  Not, "Hey, let me get your numba," but, "Do you think I could call you sometime?"  Remember, these betches think they are the ultimate privilege, especially while drinking, and you know what, she may very well be right.  If this woman has strong Eightoutof10 potential, do not proceed to the following paragraph.

In very rare circumstances, with the appropriate amount of attention and interest from your betch, or after a friendly suggestion from her pack, you may be so bold as to offer her a late night meal to soak up the booze.  When doing this, always ensure her and her pack, that you will get her safely home... even though everyone knows you two are a couple of hot dogs and a diet coke away from keeping your neighbors awake until 7 am.  I do caution you, however, that it is very possible the betch will never talk to you again after your night of ravenous sexual relation but, that is a post for another day...


Keep on Betchin!

- Eightoutof10

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If you would like to see your topic or question on love, sex, dating or men written about on eightoutof10 email me: eightoutof10@gmail.com or tweet me: @eightoutof10

#1 Be a Betch

"Betch: noun

A betch is classy, fabulous and exciting. She holds her own ground and is a confident woman. She isn't a pushover and she doesn't whine. Most of all, she is fierce, fun and fearless. Don't confuse a betch as a bitch. There's a difference. A bitch is unpleasant, selfish and malicious for no reason at all. If you're a betch, congratulations because it's a compliment. Own it." 
- @TheLeaseAgreement

I require more than average and beautiful.  Your mind counts.   Be smart, confident, aware and motivated.  Look amazing in heels and always deserve what you desire.  The moment you make me question myself, my game, you have me.  Never forget that you are the goal, that is inarguably why I said hi in the first place.  The short conversation we have could determine the next 30 seconds or the next 30 years of your life.

Be witty.  Be hard to please.  Be beautiful.  Be interesting.

Challenge my mind with ideas.

Admit when I'm right.  Never let me be wrong.

Don't let me get away with being me yet, always understand when I must.

#2 You Must be This Tall to Ride This Ride

I drive a 4x4 that sits 4 feet off the ground.  I take the doors off of it and it has no roof.  I keep a hat in the backseat so you may attempt to maintain your hair but, don't worry about it too much.  I love my ride more than you at the beginning.  If you can't climb into my Jeep you can't ride in it.  No, I wont get a step installed.

If you can't ride in my Jeep you can't ride me... You must be this tall to ride this ride.

Shoulder height or above.  I want you to be able to wear your heels and still be taller than you yet, not have to do a flat back pose to kiss you without them on.

Its more for your safety than my pleasure.  What if I rolled over in the middle of the night and smothered a petite woman while I slept?  What if my penis causes damage and you get blood on my sheets?  You short ones are breakable.  Blood never comes out of 300 count Egyptian cotton.

Men need women... NOT girls.

Be tall, beautiful and athletically capable.  I want to know I can invite you on any adventure and you will be able to accompany me.  You don't have to be good at the activity, I'll teach you all you need to know, I just want you to be fit enough to tackle any challenge I present you.

Height begets confidence.  Confidence begets me.

The List

As with all great stories it begins with the love of a woman.  Enveloping, complete, the kind of support a man could only wish for.  So powerful was this love that I gladly overlooked her flaws.  I gladly accepted our years of failures as a couple.  And then, when I needed her most, she left.  A smooth talking party boy stole her from my life and my plan leaving me in a destructive spiral as I tried to gather the pieces.

The rebound would be slow, extended by the complete comittment I had felt towards her and the reawakened pain of a woman's betrayal.  The betrayal of a woman loved and trusted is a defining and powerful realization for a man, an event he holds with him always. 

One year, one hundred women.  That is what it took.  The stories of the women, the bars and the search for trust are often lost in a haze of smoke and tequilla yet, the Sunday morning confessions of a man unhinged by lost love provides insight into the male mind and his motivations.

The list is a creation of my sexual and social experiences over the last year.  It originated from a discussion with a friend and developed over time to 10 items, some non-negotiable, that define the character, appearance, and intellect of a woman worthy of my heart and mind.  I would have stopped at the first of the hundred had she met the requirements.  Until I find her, I will write of my search for the one, my Eight Out Of 10.